i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
The beer is more important than you right now.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Randomize
