I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Everything about him screamed your future.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Randomize
