I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
