Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
