And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
