seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
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