We won't sleep together?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
