Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
My breasts were aching with rage.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I'm bleeding and have questions
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize
