oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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