you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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