Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
