she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
