just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
