names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
