i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
As shirtless as possible
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
