wat bout pragnant strippers??
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
