I CAN MOONWALK!
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize