butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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