i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
