Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
