u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
