i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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