Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
