If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
