She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I'm having to shit out rocks
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
