Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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