I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
