We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
