i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
