i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
