Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize