Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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