There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
