Is it normal to miss your booty call?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
