marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I have post one night stand depression
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