Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
