i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize