Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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