It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
