What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
