what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Randomize
