Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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