obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
