i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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