Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
