I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
