We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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