I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize