So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Randomize
