I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize