Say something about gay babies.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
